Discuss your troubles, compare ex's, offer suggestions, and share stories!
I totally understand this. It all boils down to lack of clear communication by your husband. This creates bottled up resentment and eventually it explodes. Exactly the same has happened to me but the resentment was channelled into an affair. I feel devastated that he says the affair was because of me and my behaviour in our marriage.
I feel it’s a man thing. They don’t want to talk about stuff and so they just hold onto it all. We just carry on thinking all us fine and behaving the same as normal. Then suddenly the rug is pulled out from under us. The problem is with your husband and mine is that during this bottling up they were also checking out of the marriage. They had already decided it was over so changing their mind is never going to happen. You will see in time that he wasnt the right person for you.
Thank you for your kind words. I’m sorry you had to go something similar! I hope you’ve managed to get some closure since. I hope with time my anger at the unfairness of the situation will die down and I’ll be able to let go and be at peace
I totally hear you both. Here’s another victim of being in a marriage with poor communication where my husband’s frustrations were never discussed or very rarely discussed and definitely not at the intensity of it ever leading to a divorce. But 7 years later, the rug was pulled off from beneath my feet and I was in shock. After reading your stories, i feel a little less alone and im kinda convinced - it’s not us. It’s them.
I agree with everything you said. My marriage suffered from lack of communication, he went from being distant to not leaving me alone. I eventually brought up divorce as I saw that after so many years of trying, nothing was going to change. My only regret is now all the wasted years of trying and hoping for change. I can walk away knowing I did all I could. He won’t be able to do the same.