That “Deep Doo-Doo” Feeling

In general service before joining submarines I was aboard a frigate, HMS Zulu, and we were paying courtesy visits to several ports down the eastern seaboard of the USA. Whilst in Baltimore, our Chief Tiff managed to trap and woo a young and wealthy American girl. He must have made a big impression because at every stop after that, all the way down to Fort Lauderdale, Florida, and even across to Bermuda, Jamaica and the Dutch Antilles, once the gangway was down, the pipe was made on the tannoy, “Chief Tiff-Visitor-Gangway.” Miss America would meet the ship in every port.

A month later coming alongside in Portsmouth, England, with the crew manning the side at Procedure Alpha, there on the quay looking like a million dollars and standing not 10 feet away from his wife and two kids was Miss America. I never saw a sailor fall out, get changed out of his dress uniform into his overalls and disappear back down the engine spaces so fast. His face when he saw her was a picture, a classic "Oh! &%*@!" expression of absolute shock and horror. Apparently some dim-witted crew member had mailed her an official invitation from San Juan, Puerto Rico, on the way homeward bound.

It was the end of Zulu’s current commission so I never did hear how the Chief Tiff managed to talk his way out of that one. Not that I expect any confessions on this family forum but it is definitely one for the yarn spinners. Ever had one of those moments or maybe just witnessed one?

Peter

Where are you from? England

Peter, I can't think of a similar story but that's a good one. I wonder what ever happened to that American girl?.. ha