All I’ve heard over the years is “it’s all about development”. At what point does this translate to actual winning. After all, remove all the PC blah blah, isn’t that one of the top reasons a competitive kid plays competitive sports?
He’s getting better each year but so is the competition. When does a program and coach become accountable for doing the necessary things required to win, and if they never win, are they really developing?
The kids will always play to win, and they will always care about winning and losing regardless of which level they play at. That is what attracts the competitive kids to sport.
I think when people say "don't focus on winning" they are talking more about parents taking their kid out of a good situation to chase wins, or coaches shorting the bench, or parents making fools of themselves yelling at referees. Of course winning should be the focus...of the players! The parents should be more focused on finding the right coaching and team situation that will allow their son to develop their skills so that they are able to continue competing. You'll find as they get older that the level of play jumps up significantly from year to year, it is easy to be left behind if you make the wrong decisions for the development of your player.