I personally think(or try to believe) that although the men in our lives are w/others & seemingly happy, they blame others & lack accountability as a form of denial that will come back to them in some capacity.
I am not blameless regarding my contribution to the stress in my marriage. I know I did everything in my power to acknowledge my weaknesses & reconnect with my husband emotionally. I literally had no idea that my husband had thoughts of leaving me & would have never expected him to be unfaithful. I do think many men have a difficult time expressing their emotions & with confrontation so avoid it by engaging in "the whole grass is greener approach."Once emotions get involved, they realize the grass isn't greener!Unless one is willing to work on his/her contribution & communicate in a commited respectful manner, the behavior will continue in every relationship. When the ex's/stbx's jump from lawn to lawn to lawn they will one day realize when they are eventually alone what the common denominator is! I know I intend on working on my issues so that I am a healthier person & partner in the future. I also have some semblance of integrity knowing that I didn't lie, cheat, & take advantage of another person's emotions. I don't have that emotional burden when I sleep at night. I cannot imagine that my husband in the depth of his being doesn't know that what he did was quite frankly sleazy & immoral. Either way, I don't want a man that would do this. It is not OK!!!! I feel miffed & stunned also knowing that not only as a wife but out of just basic respect for another human being that my husband was willing to put me at risk. I became fearful in my own home that perhaps some of these women were in my bed & I was their competitor ie. (fatal attraction-you just never know!). My husband used me & my vulnerability in a very manipulative opportunistic manner. While I was at work at night caring for people & making extra money here & there to pay off our mortgage, he was cheating on me.
~As for the head/heart issue comment posted earlier, I have truly been emotionally struggling but I force myself to let my head dictate my decisions. I deserve better then that. ~xoxoxox~Ladies