Courtney: Many women on this forum have been through what you have. I am sorry this happened to you. I have a relative who is still living with his wife because neither one can afford to move out. My ex left and moved far away and got a girlfriend before the divorce was final (less than a year) and said there was no love. My advice to you is to get a consultation with a Family Lawyer ASAP. It may be he just wants to stay so he won't have to pay child support, rent elsewhere, etc.
I too am going through something very similar. Found that he has been communicating with other women. Just found out that he went on a date on Tuesday last week. He is now says why stay in a loveless marriage, but as of last week I had no indication of this. The midlife crisis is a true thing. He has done many things and I have him chances and dealt with so much of his crap. But I loved him and our daughter. I am so angry at him for not saying anything or putting forth any effort to fix our marriage. Now I have to have this life due to his choices. I'm mad at myself for still loving him. I am also so angry that he has this other woman to comfort him while I am alone. This is so hard and there are times when I don't think I'm going to make it through to the next second. Wish men could realize there choices affect everyone around them.
I am so sorry you too are going through this
I am so sorry you're going through that. Emotional affairs in my experience are way worse to deal with. During my marriage, I encountered both. I found that the physical affairs were much easier to let go of because I held onto the fact that we had something much more special than that and once I changed whatever was making her angry it would be okay. However, she then had another affair a year later and this time it was an emotional affair. I had no advantage at this point. She would deny it everytime I brought it up and made me feel like I was being controlling and not wanting her to be happy. Apparently I didn't want her to have friends because of what we went through but she would tell me every day and multiple times a day that she just needed a friendship and I was her soulmate and she wanted our life. So against my better judgement I trusted her. Then more red flags. Secretive messages, bailing on our anniversary dinner and my birthday to go hang out with her "friend." It all became too much. I lost all control and would fight with her constantly. Crossing lines that I shouldnt have crossed but I was so hurt and angry because I knew there was more going on but part of me wanted so badly to believe her. Fast forward to our last fight when I decided to spend the night away from home and she spent the night on the phone with this girl. I also believe that was actually at my house and in my bed that night. The fight was so bad my ex said she wanted to go stay with her mom for a bit. She never came back. Has not reached out to me. And is now dating that girl. I feel so used. Lost. Empty. How can someone just magically go from saying you're their everything to acting like you're nothing?