I am currently going through a divorce. I was married to my husband for 18 years and we were together for 8 years prior to that. I was pretty miserable for the last 10 of those years. He basically became a raging alcoholic. He would come home and just drink himself into oblivion and stay hidden in our bedroom. We have three children. He was pretty much an absent dad and partner. I can get more into my story later.
Anyway ... one of the things I am really struggling with is ... I feel so alone. All my friends are still married and anyone I know who is divorced was either not the one that wanted the divorce or it was a mutual separation. I just feel like I no-one in my circle can relate to me and even though they are good listeners it's not the same as talking to someone that's been where you are.
Any suggestions on how to find new groups - in addition to online. It would be nice to meet a group in person. Anything I found online for things on my area seem somewhat inactive or not necessarily the right fit. I live in Central NJ.
I would recommend starting with a good lawyer. Make sure you are in a safe place first then look to deal with the legal issues and then work on socializing. Here is why.....Until you stop what is causing the pain, you aren't going to be able to rebuild. Make certain that you have a good lawyer. And by that I mean one that will look at the big picture and not just money. Divorce is just a starting point and not an ending point. Once divorced there is a big and scary world out there. If you are going to do this, do it right and for the right reasons.