Married when I was 18 he 21, thought I had it all! Now what would have been 26 years, I realize it was nothing but lies and secrets. With young kids then I guess I was to busy to notice. Now with the youngest 18, and focusing on us my eyes picked up on a lot of things. Drinking was an issue, when I asked him to quit he did. Next issue, porn. Multiple times he promised it would stop, fight after fight, lie after lie, secret after secret still not sure if he ever really did stop because he became so good at hiding things. Newest issue, more lies and keeping things from. I keep asking what I did wrong, could I have done more? And no he never cheated on me, but I can't help but feel cheated on when he self gratified himself with another female using porn. I love him, but I can't deal with secrets and lies anymore. He makes most of the income and everything is in his name. I'm terrified and lost, as to what comes next.