Do you ever feel judged for being divorced?
Have you ever regretted going through with the divorce?
Do you ever feel that who you were in your married life is a completely different person than who you are now?
Do you ever feel completely lost and scared of the future?
These are things I deal with almost daily after 4 years post divorce. I can't believe the lack of support I see for divorced women in this day and age. So many of us have questions and are suffering and just lost and scared.
I guess I just need to know that I'm not the only one that suffers from anxiety from the Scarlet Letter of divorce that I wear everyday. I feel judged by my coworkers, family and friends.
I truly can relate to how you feel. I don’t like being around f around family because I’m so ashamed that my ex husband decided he didn’t want to be married anymore. It bothers me to even say ex husband. I get this bad feeling in my stomach. I constantly dealing with anxiety and depression.
I just feel lose in what the future holds for me. I feel he used me and was buying his time until our youngest graduated from high school.
Yes I know what you mean about using the word ex-husband it feels so foreign and unbelievable to be using that word. I try not to think about the past but it seems the more I try not to the more I do. He has completely started over and replaced everything, including getting a new wife. People always tell me I should be happy for him and I can never understand that. I just wish I could forget about the whole situation but as you probably know that's pretty much impossible. Have you found it difficult to make new friends? I have a really hard time with that because my whole life revolved around the marriage and I'm kind of introverted I guess now. Not able to trust like I used to you know all the cliche divorced woman things... they may be cliche but they sure are real!
Yes, I have a very hard time connecting to other people. I’ve joined the church choir almost a year ago and I still don’t have a friend. Everyone is nice with small greetings but no real conversation to get to know a person.
My life was taking care of a man who had heart surgery, back surgery, parociditis, Depression, anxiety and a small tumor and he decided to go back to school to finish his degree while trying to work and heal from heart
surgery. I was left working and raising our youngest daughter
I’m just out here in the world with no dear friend and nothing but my yorkie to love. My oldest is in her own world with her marriage and my youngest deserves some happiness bc he threw this all on me a couple of months before her gr
High school graduation last year. So I really try not to bother her too much since she had to deal with all this through the summer.
Everyone I know is married and it makes me feel even worse to be around them bc now I have no one in my life.
Some days I just want to crawl up and die because the pain is so unbareable. I’m almost 50 with nothing to show for it. I need to try and get back in school and finish my degree.
I keep asking God why he didn’t see fit to see us through this storm? Whatever his reason was I’m left lonely with a friend.
I know it's easier to say and harder to really feel this way but..try not to feel judged - not only should people in glass houses not throw stones, but being married isn't the overall stamp of approval. I've seen so many variations of people putting on a front of the "happy couple" while he's cheating or she's abusing drugs or some variation...you get it. Divorce is a far better option than accepting less than what you deserve or being half of yourself for someone else. Divorce says you're strong and makes you stronger.
Separately, I do find it funny that 50% of Americans are divorced yet I'm in a sea of married people
Wow that was some great advice Talia...thankyou! I love your overall perspective on divorce being a better option than being half of yourself for someone else. That's what I had been doing in my marriage.
You're right about other people having issues and just putting on a brave face. I think it's just easy for me to get overwhelmed by the whole ' everybody is married but me!' Feeling. I don't want to be married, I just wish I could find some divorced people in the world LOL. It just seems like every single person I know is married. Just like what you said about being surrounded by married people.... do all the divorced people just go to some Island somewhere lol?
Thanks so much for your response it really helped me!
I feel really scared, because my husband just asked for a divorce and he's serious about it this time... i don't know what to do, and it feels like I'm just doomed to feel worse.