Not sure what to say. I've been married for 37 years. Im 56 now..and all alone and broke. I feel like I threw my whole life aw away. I really need help coping....thx
So sorry you find yourself here. Mine was 35 years and we were only a few years from early retirement. Such a waste.
My first piece of advice is to go to chumplady.com and join the forums. There's a wealth of advice and support and it's a very active community so you'll get multiple responses within hours.
My second piece of advice is instead of seeing it all as a mountain to climb, try breaking it down into pieces. I too am alone, broke, disabled and am caregiving my mom full-time. I don't have many options--yet, I'm dealing with what I can control and not allowing what I can't control get the best of me.
Third, reach out. Whether it's face to face, or with joining online support communities. It's far too easy to get caught up in the depression and grief cycles when everything feels so hopeless. By reaching out, even if it's just to get yourself out of the house for a few hours, can transform your mindset.
Hugs to you. I hope you check out that other site because it's far more supportive and active than this one is.
My hubby walked out of our marriage of almost 45 years!!! Not only that he left the country to a new relationship. Right now what angers me the most is he left without saying goodbye to our children and grandchildren. They (and I) are struggling to make sense of it all. Trying to figure out if he is an a hole or suffering from a mental breakdown of sorts.
Definitely scary times for me! I am 64 and have been retired for 2 years.
I told him I wanted to divorce in February. I left the house in April. We will be married 37 years this month. I'm hoping my divorce will become final at the end of the year.
Even though I'm the one that wanted the divorce and I understand the fear you have. I'm going to be 58 this month. I'm not ready to give up on life though. That's why I did this. Maybe that's why we all do this. We deserve some happiness. I hope you find it. I hope things get better for you.
I'm 49 and divorcing my husband of 20+ years but we've been a couple for 30. Since we were 19. We have 3 kids. I'm single for the first time in my adult life and frankly, I'm loving it. My biggest worry is finances. We share custody and he pays support but it's not nearly enough. And I've been left with our apartment. The rent is too high for me to afford. It's a matter of time before my savings is gone and when that happens I won't have the income to get approved for a more affordable apartment. Unless a miracle happens or manage to find a good enough job, I honestly don't know what will happen. I'm just taking it one day at a time.
Jamie: I was divorced in 2009. I tell people going through it that that the hardest part is financial. I go to thrift shops for clothes and sometimes the tags are still on the clothes (they are new). I went to the food pantry for a while. I suggest you do the same to save money if there is one in your area. Best wishes and I hope you will get into a more affordable home situation soon. An acquaintance of mine who is divorced always makes sure the kids clothes she pays for with her support are on sale. I was also in my late 40s when I got divorced.