It is almost 9:00 pm and I am know that I am not going to get much sleep tonight. Sadly, I barely slept last night and the night before. Two or three days ago, my husband decided that he would no longer share a bedroom with me. His decisions are often made without having a conversation with me; he simply implements an action and I have to deal with the consequences. Anyway, I have an interview tomorrow, and I don't know if I will be coherent enough to respond intelligently to the panels questions because I know I will be so tired (I don't like sleeping alone). We have been married for almost 25 years, and we have never been able to truly commit to each other. I've always known that when he retires (in five years) he will return to his country. He has made this known for years. I have no intentions of moving to another country, which is probably why I stopped investing in the relationship. When we discussed divorcing, we had decided that we would wait for our youngest child to graduate from high school (he is going into his second year of college). Yesterday, I told my husband that it is time to complete the paperwork. I will not share a house with a person who is not interested in me. We will have to relinquish our bonds. I say this like I am brave. I'm scared, because I might end of growing old alone.