My parents divorced almost ten years ago. I'm a grown woman now but I still struggle with certain aspects of it. When they split my father abandoned us and we lived in poverty for a few years. It took a long time for me to forgive him and welcome into my life again. Ever since I have, it's been a cycle of good times and bad ones. We'll do great and then he'll say or do something to hurt me (usually he leaves again or says something horrible about me or my mom). I always forgive him and the cycle starts over again. I feel that this relationship is toxic and I want to cut it off but I'm scared that I'll have regrets later in life about not having a relationship with my father. I thought it was suppose to get better but I'm a grown woman still struggling with the same things I was ten years ago.

My parents divorced when I was 16 and I am now 34. It never gets better. I chose to live with my father for a couple years then came back to my mom and I have regretted it ever since. My relationship with my mom is toxic but I need her as I have recently divorced as well. The catty comments that my mother makes about my father still hurts because I am half my father. The only thing you can do besides therapy, is to confront your father about how this makes you feel. Let him know that the toxicity of the relationship you have with him cuts you deeply. If he is still so bitter about the divorce then maybe he should seek counseling as well. Being around toxic parents regardless of the age is draining. You ahave to decide if you want to go on in life feeling this way. Don't regret if you have to cut him out of your life because you need to do what is best for you.