Feeling so much distress - maybe I finally found a place I can ask questions and get support?
Hi Everyone,
I’m 34 years old and mom to 2 children. My oldest is 9, a boy, and suffers from high functioning autism and my youngest is 4 year old, a girl.
My ex and I divorced last year after a highly traumatic and volatile period during which I was separated from both kids while they were in CA and I was working in WA (we moved to WAnwhere I started a new job together but when I asked for a divorce my ex immediately flew the kids back to CA - it was a big legal mess but in the end I conceded and surrendered to a lot of my rights - which I regret so much). I would fly back to CA to see them every other weekend. There were so many reasons this had to happen and I missed them every minute of everyday.
Late last year my ex flew a foreign girlfriend and her son over to live in his household and I was able to negotiate as a result for my 4 year old daughter to live with me in WA - but with the promise that on May 15th I would permanently relocate to CA so the siblings could reunite and so I’m close to my son again. Because of COVID I’ve asked my ex if we can remain in WA indefinitely and keep my well-paying and very stable job but of course he refused. Well I kept my promise: my daughter and I are in CA now and I fear for my future with them. I only have 30/70 time with them, as the plan was drafted when I was still working in WA. I will be able to work remotely and stay at my current employment for now - and long so much to get 50/50 time. I however still have to find a place to lease and settle many things.
Question - should I worry about filing for 50/50 parenting time now (maybe even more for my daughter who’s thrived and done so well with me) as I have so much evidence showing how well the children does with me vs. their dad? Or should I wait until things are more settled after I find a place to lease in CA? I am thinking about writing up my own modified parenting plan; my ex is not interested to change anything so I will have to do that on my own. I have no more money to pay for lawyers. With COVID there is so much employment uncertainty - but I just want to be with my children.
Help! I felt so much distress yesterday flying to CA. Any advice for me?
Re: Feeling so much distress - maybe I finally found a place I can ask questions and get support?
Hi NL,
I don't have any advice but I wanted to say how sorry I am that you are in this situation. Can you have a free consultation with an attorney to ask questions? I read on another post that there is a free resource for divorce lawyers to consult.
Hang in there and I hope you are reunited with your kids soon!