As Angela said-Go see a lawyer quickly. The fact the house is in your name, doesn’t necessarily mean he’s not entitled to some of its value.
This is not a marriage hun. He’s putting you at risk of a STD and showing no respect towards you. He may even have a sex addiction, given how frequently he’s visiting massage parlours and a ‘girlfriend.’
View paying to see a lawyer as an investment in your future. Protect your assets, yourself and your children. Close joint accounts-he’ll probably siphon money out anyway once he realises you’re divorcing him. He may try to fight for custody of your children out of spite, so be prepared to show evidence that demonstrates the kind of undesirable behaviours the children might be around, if he were to get custody (phone records, photos, texts, social media posts, eye-witness accounts etc).
Think about: Protecting yourself and your children-financially, emotionally and physically. Keep your phone near you. Check with the lawyer whether you can legally lock him out of the property. How much notice do you have to give him to come collect his belongings?
Think about where you want to live after the divorce/what social supports you will have, the logistics of raising children as a single parent, and rebuilding your self-confidence.
What assets does he have? A car? A motorbike? A pension fund? An inheritance that will be coming to him in future??? Etc. Go for gold in the divorce settlement and then lower the bar only if you need to with your lawyer’s advice.
No woman deserves to be treated like you are. Mental health can be medicated/counselled so can generally be improved, but repeat acts of adulterery are a CHOICE he’s making as an adult. Only he is responsible for his actions and choices. A personality is fixed. His seems self-centred and determined to show how little he cares about your feelings-which borders on narcissism/sociopathy. You deserve much, much better 🙏