Hi all! My name is Ashley and I filed for divorce last month. I am in that fun waiting situation where we have to live under the same roof since there are no orders in place, until Sept 22 our mediation date. This has been PURE TORTURE, as this was my decision and not my soon to be ex. He has NO friends, only his mom and dad supporting him and will not go anywhere. My attorney has told me to not leave the house (of course I can grocery shop and things) without the kids. So I have been planning play dates on weekends but its so hard to share the same space with this person. I have been trying to stay positive as that's naturally who I am especially for my kids....and we go about 1 week without a fight and that's all we can stand before someone says something and it escalates. We have good parenting team skills, and are on the same page with that, so if we keep it about that we are good. my problem is getting away from him. Its like I know myself, and if I can just get an extended break from you then I can have empathy for you and look at you as the father of my children, but having to do this day in and day out is so tolling and the time is passing SO slowly. Anyone relate? Is anyone out there who can talk on the phone or text? I had to get off FB but have an insta account. Just wanting to find like minded people that understand and are going through this now. I also have a counselor I see once a week but I have my 2 year old so its not as in depth as I would want as she interrupts us. Anyone out there?
Hi Ashley. I’m so sorry you are going through this. I’m kind of going through the same thing as of right now. I just found this page on my phone so I don’t even know if I’m sending this message right. I hope you get this message and feel that you are not alone. You are so brave. I couldn’t even file for divorce yet cause I’m scared. Scared that I’m going to make a mistake and he is going to win. I don’t even know where to start. I made a consultation appointment with a family lawyer to see my options to get some encouragement cause I need support from someone. I’m all alone in this with a 5 year old.
If you want to talk or vent, I guess this is the place? I’m not sure. Let’s see if you get this message first. Take care of yourself strong mom!!!
I'm so sorry you are going through that. Please take care of yourself and I hope you finish with all this soon.
From your post title, I get that you would like help from other women, and the first thing that came to my mind is this website called Circles, I have a friend who joined their support groups and they are doing a good job of offering help. My friend specifically told me that she felt tons of support because everyone got to share their stories and advice and they listen to each other really well. She advised me to try but I haven't got the chance yet. so maybe you could get good use of it.
This is the link https://circlesup.com/?utm_source=forums
Hi. I totally understand. It’s exactly what happened to me. I filed for divorce and then Covid hit 2 months later. I was stuck in the house with him. We had agreed that I would stay until the kids got out of school for summer break but that was going to be 5 months. He was working from home and I could hear his voice all day long. It was driving me crazy. On top of that he was angry with me for filing for divorce. He would say the most evil things to me. I did what I had to do to save myself because he was not willing to change after 4 years of counseling.
During that time I walked a lot and lost weight. I journaled in a locked app on my phone. I would go into my closet, stretch out on the floor and cry. Even though I knew I was doing the right thing for myself and the kids it hurt so much. I continued to go to counseling. When I read my journal entries from that time I can feel the heavy weight that I was carrying.
My divorce was final 2 months ago after 1.5 years. I doing so much better. I truly understand what you are going through. I started a blog community for divorce and breakups. The site is
AlimoniaLife.com
There are stories and helpful information. If you click join us we have a private group for sharing and discussions. Feel free to email me Info@AlimoniaLife.com
I communicate with people daily.
All the best to you!