Marriage counseling is not always the best decision as it is usually a last minute effort to save something that it too broken to fix. INDIVIDUAL counseling is a great idea.

DO NOT REFI and do not make any financial decisions without talking to an attorney. You are entitled to 50% of the house's value. Put your address into Zillow and see what it says. An appraisal or a trusted real estate agent is a better source but I have found Zillow to be a pretty good source. Do not get a bulldog attorney. Get one that is calm and reasonable. A bulldog attorney likes to fight...more fighting means higher attorney's fees. Divorce is bg business. Get one that only does divorce. Depending on where you live you can look up family court cases to see how many cases the attorney has handled. Do not get one that advertises. A good attorney does not need to advertise.

I am in the same exact boat with two kids and being married for 21 years! It’s so hurtful but honestly… I’m so ready to be out of this verbally abusive relationship! It’s so toxic that my close friends have time snd time again say..”I don’t understand why your still going through this.” But I feel I’m trapped and he’s planning on leaving after our son has graduated high school. He has put all business assets into his business partners name for a reason… divorce! So I’ll be screwed in the end. I totally and purely get where your coming from. It’s sooooo hurtful and lonely!