I too am divorcing a narcissist, I also have children. Its not easy and you will go through a range of emotions, cry if you need to cry (it helps), I've watched a range of you tube videos, TED talks, pintrest posts on narcissism to empower myself about the type of behaviours they will use whilst going through divorce. Keep Limited contact if you can, make strict boundaries, if you need to, communicate via email and text (evidence for solicitor/lawyer), do not show them any emotions even if it is killing you to hold back, do not beg or plead, you won't change them or get them to see your point of view EVER, it will be a bumpy road, but concentrate on yourself and your children, talk to friends and family, do not keep things to yourself. I hope some of this helps.
Hi you guys! I’m pretty sure I’m divorcing a narc as well. The level of mind games and manipulation have been unreal. Any support you can offer would be so appreciated.
Hi there, I am also divorcing a narcissist. We were married for 20 years. I’m learning as I go but my best advice, don’t let him see you upset or hurting. Limit your communication with him which if you have kids like I do, it’s really hard. He is going to do everything he can to break you. Do not let him. Easier said than done but for your own sanity, do it. My soon to be ex says the cruelest things to me and at first it absolutely killed me. It took some time to realize that his cruelty was a reflection of his own misery. I don’t buy into it anymore. You can and will get through this!
I am going through the same thing. My husband and I have been married for 16 years, together 20, best friends for 22. He came to me a week and a half after our 16th wedding anniversary, out of the blue, and said he "had doubts" about our marriage. He paid (actually his daddy paid for) a lawyer 1 month later, didn't tell me he intended to file, the filed 1 month after that while I was on vacation with my friends. And still didn't tell me! I had to find out about it online, and even then, had I not been looking, I would not have known he filed until I was served at my work the day I got back from my vacation. He's such a **** coward. And a narcissist, as is his father. He's been so cruel, so deceitful, and lying about so much, even to his attorney! The worst part is we have an 11 year old son who is having a really hard time. I'm trying to process so much, especially right now with the holidays. I honestly just don't understand any of it. I've only ever loved him. I've never deceived him, lied to him, cheated on him, or anything of the sort. I can't help but wonder if he's having an affair. I'm feeling so lost, alone, and completely shattered. I never, ever thought he'd ever hurt me in any way. I thought he was a good man. Thought I was one of the lucky ones.
I think my husband is a narc… lots of emotional, verbal and angry outbursts. Always makes me feel like it’s my fault telling me that I triggered him. That I need to learn to walk away or watch how I talk to him. We have two little kids, one toddler and a newborn. I’m really thinking of divorcing him but I am so scared of what lies ahead if I do end up divorcing him. And knowing him, he’ll probably fight for full custody which will break my heart. Any advice?