I have been divorced for 2 years and I have the absolute best boyfriend anyone could ask for. He’s loving, kind, generous, a fantastic father and just the sweetest thing ever. He would love to marry me some day but I will not marry again. He knows that and it breaks his heart. Why do I feel like this? I feel like it’s not fair to my boyfriend and hell to be honest, there are days I just wish I was single. I am perfectly content with being alone. I have my own home and am very independent. Some days I feel like I am just crazy. I tell myself that other girls would give anything to have someone like him and here I am contemplating whether or not to stay in this relationship. Why? What is wrong with me? Relationships are hard work and maybe I’m just not ready for it.

Hi, As you've only been divorced for 2 years, I suspect your heart and mind still have a lot of unprocessed emotional hurt to process. The thought of potentially jumping into a new marriage probably scares the hell out of you, subconsciously. There's no need to rush into a marriage again. If you're happy as things are with your boyfriend, why be pressured into marrying again? That old adage 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it,' comes to mind!

Your independence in having your own home is a really strong 'protective' factor. If things don't work out with him long-term, you can have peace of mind that you've got a safe haven.

Also-you describe him as loving, kind, generous etc. Is the relationship positive and reciprocal or are you bored/feel unequally matched?

I guess you can keep the relationship light for the moment. Maybe keep living separately, get to know him better over time, and...if he wants you, he'll be prepared to wait until/if you become ready for a deeper commitment. I'd be trusting my gut instinct. If he were to break it off with you-would you feel upset, or relieved...? Have a think about that, as it can help provide some insight into your true feelings 🌸