Do not do anything just because he wants you to or because it will help him. You need to take care of yourself and your children.
Get our own attorney if you don't already have one. Do everything you need to do to protect your assets and your rights. Document everything.
Do not agree to anything or sign anything that does not come through your attorney.
Put your feelings aside, I know you are upset, but that isn't going to help you or your children. Take every action and step that you need to do to protect your kids and yourself.
Sadly, there is nothing you can do to control your soon to be ex-s behavior. You will need to work within the confines of the law and a good attorney, as well as work on your own triggers so that you can control them and be a good role model for your child.
Do you know how to interview attorneys? What questions to ask?
Depending on what state you live in, do you know if divorce mediation is a pre-req to trial? And, if so, do you know what to look for in a mediator?
These are just a few of the questions I can help you answer if you need outside support. And no, I am not a therapist but a certified divorce coach. I work exclusively with women going through divorce who still have children living at home.
Please feel free to respond to me by email if you're interested.
Best of luck to you and know that many have travelled this road successfully ahead of you. You're not alone.