I am trying to escape a similar husband right now. Do not settle. Do not get married if he's a narcissist. Lack of empathy means he'll likely be a bad father too. Mine became physical and attacked ne last weekend now is trying to frame me for injuries he caused himself while I was on the phone with 911 in the other room. Some men are crazy. Pray about it, meditate on it, listen to your intuition. Best wishes

As others have said, please re-read your post. There are some strong 'red flags' that are concerning. Words and phrases such as 'controlling,' and 'lacks empathy.' Rude and unkind...

Please do not tether yourself to a man like this. If he's not 'wooing' you at this stage of your relationship, he's certainly not going to put the effort in once he's 'got you'/your married to him.

As another poster suggested, perhaps extend the engagement out by another year: Delay the marriage/push the date out (blame Covid safety concerns re: large gatherings?!) Put him on trial. Don't tell him though, as you want to observe his natural behaviours. Keep a diary of how he treats you. See if there is any improvement (or deterioration of his attitude and behaviours toward you). 2 years is not very long to have know him to get married. Your gut feeling and natural instinct are warning you that this doesn't feel right. Listen to the warning and heed it. As others have said; once children, mortgages etc are in the picture, this can add pressure to a marriage. You need to be certain that whomever you marry therefore s working in partnership with you-as an equal: Equal say in matters and decisions affecting the marriage/mutual respect/kindness and support. 'Controlling,' 'lacks empathy,' 'rude' and unkind...sound way, way off the mark of being an equal, mutually-respectful partnership...