I agree whole heartedly with Allison - you are deserting him, you are keeping you and your children safe. He deserted you when he chose violence.

You already told him in the past that if he does it again you are leaving. He obviously didn't believe you. He thinks he can do anything he wants and you will accept it. If you go back, he will think the same thing. Sure he had a work a little more at it but he still got you to come back, and he will be confident of getting you back next time too. He doesn't yet believe that you are really leaving.

If he were serious, he would going to great lengths to get you back. Going to anger managerment counseling (not marriage), seeing the boys every day, talking about what he is doing to make it safe for you and the boys to come home. Instead he begging and crying for you to come back, but is not truly offering you anything more but the same treatment.

I for one am very proud of you. You had the courage to do what so many woman do not. I should have left my husband after six years of marriage, the first time someone accused him of molesting their daughter. But instead I believed him when he said he did not do it. Because I stayed my own daughters were hurt. I would do anything to undo the damage I have done by staying so I have to say it again...YOU DID THE RIGHT THING. I am not an advocate of divorce, which is why I stayed for 17 more years, but I belive now that there are some good reasons. Am I saying I think you should get a divorce? No! What I am saying is that you were right to leave until he seriously gets help. By the time my husband seriously got help it was too late for us. Our lives have been forever altered by his choices. My children's lives have been forever altered by his choices. I would give anything to be able to go back 17 years and do things differently for the sake of my children and my own as well. Stay strong and don't give in until he gets help.