Hello, I’ve just read the additional information you added. I still wouldn’t recommend contacting him-It sounds as if he may have previously emotionally manipulated your good nature.
He’s in the care of professionals at the hospital: The best place he can be if he’s unwell, so you can take some peace of mind from that :)
If you want to check how he’s doing; I wonder if you could call the hospital and ask how he’s doing? Some will, and some may not, share a general update on the phone, but it’s worth enquiring. At least you may then discover how he’s doing, but without direct contact.
Think long-term here hun. If he tries to contact you when he’s out of hospital, you risk being put back on the emotional roller coaster with him, all over again. If he’s still in hospital in 10 days time when you phone the hospital a second time (only if you want to), then maybe him being in hospital for that length of time might indicate his health is not looking too great/he’s quite ill, in which case you can review your options regarding a card or a text - or even a visit maybe?
Do you know a third party (any of his relatives for example), you could ask about how he’s doing?
You might be the nicest, kindest, most humble person in the world, but that does NOT mean risking your safety, your peace of mind or your future happiness. Don’t sacrifice your own personage for someone who has already proven himself not to be healthy for you to be around.
Look up ‘’codependency’ also and read about whether any of the indicators match with how you’re feeling about getting in touch with him...
Hi
Actually I do have someone that can keep me posted it without him knowing ...
And I was thinking his sister lives 5 minutes away from his house even she can care for him (if she wishes) they are only 3 years apart from each other (she is the youngster)
Thank you for your suggestion ✌️
Hi, I'm sorry you are going through this.
I also divorced my husband due to emotion abuse and anger outburst/rages. Although he admitted to his behavior and is trying to make it up to me; I don't want to have to take care of him if he gets sick :), but I probably would.
Now, you are free to do as little or as much as you want. Actions have consequences, if he treated you so badly that you want nothing to do with him and he is alone in the hospital- then that is on him.
But, then if you chose to have compassion for him and wanted to visit, check in on him, bring him some food, etc. then you might find some comfort in that. I don't think there is a right or wrong choice, it is just a choice that you have the right to make for yourself.
First of all, take care of yourself!
All the best!
Hello
I am not sure if I want to take care of him or visit him...as much as it hurts me knowing he is sick . he can be very controlling and I will be to weak to be away from him because I will be sorry for him if I start taking care of him while he is sick
Thank you for sharing your thoughts even though I still confuse and lost of what I will decide to do
Sorry 😞 you also went through this type of behavior
Let us all stay strong 🙏
Take care Everyone
Love and Peace to Everyone in these forum