Yes, it's sad things have to be the way they are. My ex lost all my trust in him a long time ago and I still get more halve truths than I know what to do with from him. He just tells people what he thinks they want to hear. That's one great thing about this divorce. I don't have to say or think...."I have a liar for a husband." He can twist and manipulate all he wants....but he is not MINE anymore and I say that with PRIDE instead of SADNESS.

Susan

Sounds like you are seeking validation for morally bankrupt behavior! Good like with that!!!

You will find no sympathy from me as well.... but for your "wife's" sake:

Do not lead her on only to hurt her until you're good and ready to let her go.

Do not give her the ol' "I love you, but am not in love with you line."

Do not try to justify yourself in any way to her...she knows better

Answer her as truthfully and honestly as possible without trying to justify yourself in any way, shape, or form.

You are already going to hurt her enough as it is...so don't get greedy and vengeful in this divorce

Never tell her how wonderful this other woman is and how it just happened...because it didn't just happen and this woman is not wonderful for what you and she are allowing to happen to your wife.

You are about to rip out someone's heart so be a gentleman and look at all things from her perspective when dealing with issues.

Never put her down or disrespect her actions or feelings or anything you may search for to reflect some blame on her to relieve your own guilt.

Don't talk bad about her to others to justify your own actions for what you are about to do.

You loved this woman enough to marry her at one time so don't flaunt this other woman all around town and respect your wife enough not to allow this woman to be flaunted or even presented to her in a social situation.

I could go on and on...BUT JUST THINK OF YOUR WIFE...this is so sad.

Susan

Quickly.
And I get the house.
And the good car.

I'm a firm believer that you have to "earn" your way out of a marriage. Being married for only one year and giving up is NOT earning your way out. Marriage is very difficult, rest assured. If we're on this forum, we already know that and live it. What needs to take place now, whether you end things with your wife or not, is that you seek counseling. You are not drawn to this other woman because she is your soulmate. You are drawn to her because of something lacking within you...some insecurities of your own. What will likely happen is that you will leave your wife for this other woman, only to find another that REALLY "completes" you. It will never stop. Nobody will ever make you happy unless you are happy with yourself. So go ahead and do your wife a favor...call it quits so that she can eventually realize some true happiness someday. In the meantime, get used to that guilt. It will live with you forever.

Selfish pig! Your wife deserves better than you. A selfish, self centred, narcisistic grub! Get an annulment then she won't have the baggage of one failed marriage, its you that is the failure, not your wife. Grow up and get some balls and take some responsibility for the commitment you made to your wife. Tell this other woman to GO AWAY. You are both destructive & selfish.

Well Sun you wanted as many answers as you could get. Happy?
We know you prefer no judgement but so is life.....

OMG, I just read this whole thread at once and cannot stop laughing!!!! What was "SUN" thinking posting on a site for woman and divorce?!!!! Apparently he is clueless in all aspects of his life! Do you think this is what he was thinking he would get when he posed his ever so carefully worded question? After all, he did tell us not to judge, ladies!!! His wife may not know it for awhile (BTW, I love how he says she is a "catch" -- hope she hasn't caught something from him!) but he is doing her a huge favor.

I'm sure he had NO CLUE. Men they are so stupid sometimes. That's what happens when you think with your d**k instead of your brain.

Probably gets a rise from getting a rise out of people. So to speak

Lisa > The sad truth of the matter is that many men think with their d***s but they are very bad thinkers!!!

So true. My ex thought with his ALL THE TIME..that's why he is my ex.