Strong Spirit : You are so right.. most of the things that your soon to be ex does i just to get to you. Mine is the same way. He will talk about anyting but the problems he will even have a conversation wth me like nothing had even taken place. I have to do the same that you are doing and that is just make a joke out of it. I guess our marriage was over a long time ago when I stopped sleeping in the same bed with him but I had never noticed or at least wanted to notice. The other day my older son said: I don't like my little brother that much because he is in mature he is 10 yrs old and acts like he is 8 mom ! I tell him well daddy is in mature but I deal with it ! He replies yeah well I can't he makes me crazy he needs to grow up. Then this morning my 10 yr old says, I don't see why you two got married you have nothing in common and mom is always right and you can never agree on anything. Husband was sitting right there... Those statements told me that the kids get it so when we do tell them the news , fingers crossed they will be fine with it. I want to add that you are very strong to do what you do, I hate it that he he here and has a right to be here, I hate it that he touches the things that I clean and makes a mess thinking I will clean it up because I like things clean and neat, hell I will leave it there until it grows I am not his maid anymore. It is sad that your soon to be ex does not talk to the kids, sounds like to me that he is playing a game with you and waiting for you to respond . You are doing the right thing with your kids and trying to keep it all together. Good for you and stay strong because he will do a lot of little things to get a reaction from you..