Going back and setting visitation might not be a bad idea. Any agreement made on the children can always be taken back to court. Have you documented his visitation-or lack thereof? We have visitation set but we are far more flexible than the agreement suggests. However, it does give us a framework and it does prevent the bullying from happening. If there were to be a huge conflict we would default to our plan-which, by the way, I think is far too lenient in his favor. My attorney told me it's about as good as I can get it. Grrrr. It's typical visitation with every other weekend, but the 1/2 summer deal and 1/2 Christmas break through me for a loop!!!! He left and now I have to be without my kids? But I digress. My stbx had that mentality (of your ex) as well until it was in writing. My comeback to him when he comments about them being his kids and being able to see them whenever he wants is "You should have thought about that before you left. You did this to our family, not me." That usually sets him back on his heels. I have made it a point to "be busy" a few times when he thought he'd come at the last minute. I have told my oldest (like it should be his problem) that he doesn't always know everything we have planned. I tell him it's good to make plans with his dad, but it'd be best if his dad talked to me first so we don't have any scheduling conflicts. So now when his dad asks him (yes him, not me) he tells his dad he should talk to me and hands me the phone. It takes the pressure off of him. Hopefully a judge will set the visitation to what is best for the child. Therefore, visitation on school nights would be limited. Good luck. How frustrating that he has not exercised his rights and now wants to! Keep us posted.

The flea got the visitation he asked for but now he wants more or so he says. He just wants, what he can't get. I give him more time with our son and he won't take it, but when wants to fight or just wants to bug me, he comes and throws that he wants more time with our son. I tell him where have you been, when this and that, I asked you to come and pick him up, then of course I throw his NEW LIFE on his face and he just leaves my house all mad and tells me at the end we will see who will win, What is that suppose to me, I don't know but apparently he seems to think he is the better parent. That just makes me laugh.

In your problem I do believe you ex should have set visitation and you should do something about now, he is just playing games with you and your daughter and you need to put a stop to it. Good luck and keep us posted.