I hope you have an attorney representing you. This guy sounds like my husband. So controlling! (My husband also did the grocery shopping)I don't know if your children are still at home? You must have a disability to get SSI so I assume can't work. Just because he doesn't want something doesn't mean it's not going to happen. This is a long term marriage. I don't know about your state but here you would most likely get spousal support for at least 10 years. Maybe longer if you are disabled. Stand up to him. Make sure you don't agree to anything that isn't set by the courts. He is actually going to be the big loser in the end. I will pray for you.