MY son still thinks the flea, will come around and will want to be his "dad" one day. He wants the "old dad" back, I really don't know which one is that because the flea was never there for him. Becky have you tried just letting Jerk do the work. I mean just wait until he wants the divorce, I don't know if that is a option for you.

Yes, I have sat back and let him do the work...for a year. He wrote up the first proposal right away-absolutely ridiculous. In fact my first attorney told me he ethically could not represent me if I was going to agree to that plan. He is very passive aggressive and he controls the situation by doing nothing. He will harrass me and ask me about it, threaten me about it (all without witnesses of course). I really am not in a hurry to finalize things (what will the final paper change? Not much), but with the bankruptcy I don't know that time is on my side. The longer I wait the more he thinks of to do to make me miserable. And, unfortunately, he is very good at that, and I have not yet learned how to fully control my emotions.