Dear Bridget, I know exactly how you feel. I am or know I will soon be experiencing all the same feelings. After so many years together it is almost impossible to imagine a life without our men. I am trying to think like Kathleen and realize that the man I loved isn't there any more. But that is very hard because, for me, it is necessary to honor all that we were, I also feel a very strong need to have him be a part of my life always. I am hopeful that when all is done, if we are not together, we will at least be able to be close friends. I honestly do not know if that will be possible. My heart goes back and forth about what it wants, about my feelings toward him. Love, hate, they are just very jumbled together right now. Mostly I just settle in the midde with great sadnes, regret, and deep disapointment in him and his behavior. Hang in there sweet lady. I understand. We will get through this in time.

Dear Alone, I too feel like I need him in my life. He actually wants me to be friends with him and live with her. I just can't be his friend as long as he is with the OW (I have many other words for her). If he were to leave her and get a new girlfriend, someone that had no part in breaking up our marriage I could be friends with him, but not the way it is now. He has told me that he wants it all, her, me and everything. That will not happen. I will not be second best in anyones life. But with that said it is so hard not to email him or call him, but I am trying my hardest not to do that again.
I know we will all be ok and get through this time but it is no fun that is for sure. I just want to see in the future about a year and make sure I am still ok. Hang in there, we will all get through this.