I get it. Completely. My youngest who is a young adult is refusing to talk to me. Almost 5 months now. With nothing. If you can. Get him and yourself into counselling together. Or at the very least him with a school counsellor. Make it part of the separation agreement. I cant force mine to go as he’s an adult. But if I could I would because he’s not hearing my side of things. Patience. I know it completely sucks. But patience. This is a massive change for everyone. And for children itfeels like their world has just ended. I’m sorry your hurting. I really do know what it like. Mom guilt sucks.
Thank you for your insight and advice, Mabel. I think part of this is my "mom guilt" as you called it. It's hard to differentiate between typical 15 yo moodiness/puberty and what may be the 15 yo repercussions from the separation and upcoming divorce. Prior to this, my husband would take our son's distance/lack of engagement personally (and to some extent, it was warranted) and I'd always remind him that this is just that time in life where our son is trying to establish his independence/identity separate from us. But, that reasoning didn't apply to me because my son and I were sooo tight. Evidently, it's time for me to learn that lesson too. This is how I need to learn to separate and continue to be a loving mom to this intelligent, amazing and challenging young man. One day at a time, right??!!!