Please realize that this is said in your best interest.
Just have to say you could have been my ex to a degree. If you really aren't going to give marriage counseling a shot it's time to get out. Things will only get worse over the years until you do. Your kids need to have a chance to see what a happy/healthy relationship looks like. Everyone will be better off.
Do yourself a favor and get individual counseling. You will probably carry these problems with you relationship wise unless you can figure out what you feel is missing.