You share the sentiments of so many on this site. First, quit tormenting yourself by looking on Facebook. There have been some threads about this on this site. If you continue with Facebook, set it up so you can't see what he (and gf) and up to. It sounds to me like you don't really want him back. What I experienced initially was a loss of the dream-I had dreamed of a perfect family (as I'm sure we all have) and this is the end of that dream. I have been to a counselor and that really helped me sort out my feelings. I only went a few times but it was beneficial for me. One of my children continues to go. The anger and sadness are all part of the horrible process. It is a horrible process. We hate watching our kids suffer, and this is something we can't fix. But you will survive. It will be OK in time. Hang in there. Hugs.

Look I think I can relate. I had been with this man for more than 20ys. and then one day he decided I longer live up to his image and had to find another woman. Big Foot works with him. He thinks she is woman of his dreams, He still calls me to let me know his plans, when he is having my son over. I play right into his hands and let him tell me what he is up to with her. I have tried to tell him how his Big Foot is getting between him and our kids, time after time, he don't care. I have stopped I will no longer talk to him about anything that is not about out son. I have decided he is no longer worth the time or my energy. If you have your kids with you make the best of it. Have fun with them and make it like, they are the most important people in your life. One thing I have to learn is to just not forget about me. I need to take care of me too.

Take care and do something for yourself today. Don't try to solve problems that you know we can't.