one more thing that's coming to mind..
when an addict innebriates, they are suppressing their emotions. SO, often the ones they are close to, that are functioning (non addicts) in their lives, wind up expressing the emotions for both..does that make sense? I know with ex, he was not currently using/innebriating, BUT he was in the habit of not dealing dealing with his emotions so he had no stress coping skills, he would snap on a dime (anger),
leave (move out) when stressed, etc. In other words, the spouse that is functioning in the marriage winds up often expressing the emotions for both.. !?!!
When he would do silent treatment I got mad/hurt/ confused.. I spent so much time in emotions that I should not have had to be in because he wouldn't deal with (his own).
SO, for me.. then & now I HAVE to push ahead & work hard just as then, it is same now/ I don't like what he did to me & my life but it was representative of his life, NOT MINE.
I choose life.
:)
I think it would be neat to be a life coach...
I'm not sure what they charge to see.. therapy is helpful I think to get unstuck but being ACTIVE in a literal sense for me is how I feel happy.. when he was here (before married, married, & now /divorced).
remember the dys function keeps us as their crash pad.
we are/were their wife not crash pad.

Atta Girl, StrongSpirit. Stay true to yourself. You know what you need to do and you know what's best for not only you but for your kids as well. Keep us posted on these appointments. Hugs.