I hold on th the fact that I was heavily medicated at the time we got married. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

You are too funny! But I SO understand! I always remind myself I was only 18 when I met him, 19 when I married. And I was a YOUNG 19, very very naive. I know for a fact that if I had then the personality that I have now, I wouldn't have even given him the time of day. So I excuse myself and forgive myself for giving him such a huge role in my life when he SO did NOT deserve it. Sigh. We live and we learn. But then again, if I didn't meet him, if I didn't live through this, I probably would have stayed very young and naive, blind to my own strength and ignorant of possibilities (and goes without saying, my children wouldn't be here, and I do believe they will be awesome adults and spread the message of hope and perseverance through their actions). No matter how angry or depressed I get, I actually am grateful for it. I feel I learned 100 lifetimes-worth of lessons in just one! (And, hopefully, I am not even halfway done yet!). I hope everyone can see this in their own unique (yet similar) situation, see how you have grown, and please God, take it easy on us for our remaining years!! We are still standing despite it all, still moving forward even though some idiot decided he had the right to dampen our spirits. Well, what does that say? We are all incredibly strong! Even on the days we cry, the days we rage, the days we despair...we are STILL HERE and we will keep going and peace will come. Success is the best revenge, right? Showing them we can do just fine without them thank you very much is empowering. It is SO important that we nurture our own souls. We've all been through a lot, better days are coming as long as we keep going.

Sure, we've got medicated and young/naive. I'm afraid I was just STUPID. If I had to do it all over again, I, too, would. I'd get my babies then run like he11.

Yeah, let him think you're an idiot, sometimes that's better! If he thinks you can see right through these things, he might work with his lawyer to make it more cryptic and that will be even more annoying when you can see how hard he tries to trick you. I am grateful that my stbx is not too bright, so figuring out what he is trying to do doesn't take much effort! I hope you can keep it out of court. You are being really kind, not going for more when you can get it! But I understand, if doing so would drag it out longer...yeah, no thanks, just GO. If GF really is pressuring him to hurry up the divorce, I would think it will be to your advantage. You are smart to stick with what you want. I know someone who went into huge debt because she just wanted it DONE. I hope you get your freedom soon!

Jerk is so anxious to be done. First he tried applying a lot of pressure, harassing me about it and bringing it up at very bad times, etc. I got in his face and calmly and quietly said, "Stop harassing me. This is something I will not tolerate. If you have a problem with it, talk to your lawyer." So he went from dumb to dumber and did some other really stupid things like quit paying child support thinking I'd sign anything to get money, quit paying his share of the mortgage thinking I'd panic at the thought of losing my home. It really backfired on him. I didn't react to either of the above items. Didn't bat an eye-never said a word. Then he got word from his attorney that there was a court date set to retrieve back child support and temporary support. He was FREAKED. He didn't think I'd stand up to him I guess (don't know how-I've never been a doormat). So the attorneys were then spending their time and energy-and our money-to work out the temporary issues rather work on the actual divorce. He did NOT want to face that judge. This process really cannot be hurried. Anything with the law, it seems, has its own sweet timeframe.