There will be no cake. The cake is a lie. LOL! Thing is, even if that is what he wishes for, I'm better off now than I was. And I'm so much better than Beast is - because I'd never get involved with a married man, even if the person he's married to was the one he cheated on me with, ya know?

Let him continue to mow the Astroturf - it'll still never feel or look as good as the real thing.